My sweet, handsome boy. Tomorrow you turn ONE. Can you believe it? I know I can’t, but we will talk more about that tomorrow. Today, I want to finally share your birth story – the day that you changed our life forever!
I was scheduled to be induced with you on September 12, 2016. We went in bright and early – to my surprise! It’s not uncommon to be delayed, but they had us come in right away. We arrived to Madigan Army Medical Center shortly after 8am to what seemed like a ghost floor…one hour later that all changed. They had started my IV, paperwork was signed, I had met with the anesthesiologist, and we thought we were good to go. But then we were told due to several emergencies (the ghost floor now looked like a zoo), we would be sent home and would hopefully come back later that day. Well, later came, and so did a phone call from one of the MFM doctors. She said that after talking with the anesthesiologist, the team decided that I would need continuous cardiac monitoring during birth that would require an additional nurse. With that news, we were told we would wait until the next day. I was heartbroken. I was beyond ready to meet you but I also knew things were getting tricky so I didn’t fight it too much.
The next day we started the process again around 10am. By 1pm the induction started and we decided to go with the foley bulb over any medication at that point because it could be better controlled and I was barely 1cm. Fast forward about 4.5 hours, the bulb fell out – and some relief came with that. At this point the contractions were definitely manageable, although increasing in intensity and frequency – exactly what we wanted!
We were trying to hold off on breaking my water and starting pitocin until 7pm – AKA – MAMA COULD EAT! I was feeling pretty good at this point except for a nagging headache. My blood pressure was spiking occasionally but my heart rate was well controlled. By this time your Auntie Meg (the best friend and photographer a girl could ever ask for) had arrived too! She brought you the sweetest little hat and book. I had my team and we were ready!
7pm – pitocin started, water broke, and things quickly started to pick up. The contractions were still manageable. I could breathe through them and use the ball and chair by my bed to change up positions. Not being able to walk around was tough, but they were not going to budge on the monitoring.
Then I started getting a horrible headache – I’m talking the worst headache I have ever had, and I suffer from complicated migraines. It was far worse than any of the contractions combined and I was desperate for relief. And because the headache was quickly getting worse, I was having a harder time getting through the contractions. Dan tried everything he could to massage my head, neck, and do anything to help – nothing helped.
Finally around midnight I started screaming for some relief – again, from the headache – not at all what I thought I’d be giving into for pain relief. I was given Nubain and that was a BAD idea. It helped relax my body a bit, but didn’t take the pain away – mostly made me feel a bit out of it on top of the horrific headache and the increasingly painful contractions.
4am – I was done but only 4-5 cm still and had a long way to go. At that point I decided that if maybe I could ease the contractions just maybe I could get some headache relief. It was epidural time. I had said from the beginning that I’d be open to it – we honestly thought I’d have to have it at some point for pain control to keep my heart rate and blood pressure down, but to everyone’s surprise, my heart rate was actually staying quite low (we’re talking in the sub100s and I hadn’t had a rate like that since pre-pregnancy). After a few attempts and one nasty nurse anesthetist (only bad experience), the epidural was in. The epidural certainly gave me some relief from contractions but I could still feel them and that’s what I wanted. I refused to press the button again because I wanted to be able to feel everything when the time came. And that I did. The headache never went away but the intensity at least went down for a bit so I could get a little rest. At that point I’d been awake over 72 hours and I was getting nervous I wasn’t going to have the energy when it came time to push.
6am ish — you decided to give us quite the scare. The staff worked quickly to reposition me and nothing was working. Finally the doctor said we would be able to try one more thing and if that didn’t work we would be headed to the OR. After giving me more fluids vaginally (I’m sure there is a term for that) you started doing better. Once you were born, the doctors told us the cause was likely because you were laying on your cord.
10am – here comes the pressure. This is actually kinda funny. I’ve witnessed many births and have heard about every variation of “the pressure is there (I have to poop feeling)” there is and many times it’s not quite time to push. Being the expert ( HA!) I am just told Dan and Megan that I was feeling a little pressure but there was no way it was time because it should be a lot worse. Again, HA! Jokes on me. The epidural had mostly wore off because the contractions were back to being out of this world, but again, the pressure was pretty mild.
I was also told that all of the COBs were in a meeting for the next hour. So what were we all supposed to do? Someone told the midwife on the floor- she decided to check me and she says “+3” well I knew what that meant but I wanted to know how dilated I was – 10 – WHAT??? I instantly burst into tears and just couldn’t contain my excitement. That was hands down one of the sweetest moments I’ve experienced – that anticipation of knowing it was almost time.
10:27am – time to push. In that moment I’ve never been more thankful for such a compassionate nurse. Nicole (the best OB RN ever!) coached me through a few pushes, helped me to tell what I needed to work through, and then when I needed to push. I was still dealing with the headache and didn’t know how I was going to get through what was about to come, but I was ready. Your dad, Megan, nurses, and the MFM were amazing – seriously the dream birth team.
One push and I was in trouble – my head was spinning. One contraction. One push at a time. 22 hours of labor – we could do it. Your dad would count. Megan would count. Everyone was silent when I needed them and cheered me on when I needed them. After only 20 minutes of pushing I didn’t know how I was going to keep going. I had been using a mirror and I remember hearing the doctor tell me to look but I couldn’t see anything – everything was hazy. I started to tell your Dad I couldn’t do it – something was wrong, but then I heard the doctor tell your Dad to get ready. I knew that I had to give it my all and on that push they helped me reach down, placed you into my hands, but stopped briefly because the cord was caught somehow, then placed you on my chest at 10:48am. The single greatest moment of my life.
I remember looking up at your Dad and not having to say anything. God had blessed us with you and you were better than any dream we could have ever had.
Your cry was the sweetest sound I had ever heard. And son, did you have a cry! You cried for TWO HOURS straight. The nurses told us that was a good thing though because you were having some abnormal breathing, so the crying was actually helping you.
After one full hour of skin to skin, Daddy took you over to get you weighed and examined. 7lb 12oz and 20.5in long – you were absolutely perfect! To see your Dad with you – the way he just adored you and instantly seem to know what to do was amazing. I’ll never forget seeing him hold you for the first time. After years of dreaming of you and praying for our family, you were here and you were ours!
The rest of the day was a whirlwind. We worked on your latch and did a lot of skin to skin. You weren’t a fan of eating at first. In fact, for the first two weeks of your life you were fed with a syringe, but eventually got it down.
My goodness, my sweet boy, you have so much hair!!
Never doubt how much you are loved sweet boy! Your Auntie Meg is such a blessing to our little family. She never left my side while I was carrying you and your Daddy was deployed, and she was there to help welcome you into this world. Because off her, we will have these memories for the rest of our lives.
The next day she even came back to document your first bath and take a few more photos of us as a family!
Caden, it has taken me a year to share your birth story because I have wanted to keep those moments sacred – and they always will be, but I’m finally ready to share them with the world. Today, it feels right. And tomorrow, you turn one. I cannot wait to share more!
Lastly, here is the birth video that Megan surprised us with. Grab a box of tissues and be prepared for an emotional 8 minutes.
Photographer | Megan Montalvo Photography